TGIM! Yup, Thank Goodness It’s Monday everyone! Who says you have to wait for Friday before having a good day, right? Monday’s are a great day to set your intention for the week. This is exactly why The I Simply Am Podcast is released every Monday and why we give you tools you can use every week to live your best life. You’re not going to want to miss this weeks podcast so listen to it out right now or view it on iTunes (or continue reading the show notes below).
ISA Community Shout Out
My ISA Shout Out this week is to Mick Hall. Mick has been instrumental in supporting me in making my dreams come true. Specifically, he’s joined my Accountability Team (Listen to Episode 5 if you want to find out what that is). I appreciate how supportive, compassionate, and inspiring he is. Watching him reach out to others, like myself, makes me want to in turn reach out to others.
If you’d like to get an appreciation and a shout out join us on Facebook and let me hear from you. I’ll be happy to mention your business or site on the show and in the show notes.
This last week the podcast was #13 in iTunes’ Top Podcasts for Self-Help. It did wind up bouncing up and down in position so I’m not really sure how the ratings work. While it would be great to be up there in the Top 10, we’ve only been in production for just over a month and I’m honored and humbled I’m even listed. The Podcast is being heard in almost 2 dozen countries including Korea, China, Turkey, Australia, New Zealand, UK, South Africa, India, and many more…Thank you all for listening no matter what Country you’re in!
Today’s Topic: The One Thing That’s Holding You Back in Life (and how to overcome it)
I’m going to list 4 different scenarios and I want you to tell me what the pattern is.
1. “I never have any money left over after I pay my bills! When is the economy going to turn around? I’m really tired of those Politicians.”
2. “My Manager is a moron and I can’t get ahead in this Company. I wish he would just quit already!”
3. “Whenever I hang out with my friend I can’t get a word in and it’s always about her. Why do I always wind up with friends who are so self-absorbed?”
4. “My wife always makes me so mad. In fact, it’s gotten to the point where I have to work late and even stop at the bar on the way home just to get some relief.”
Did you notice a theme in these 4 scenarios?
If you guessed blame you’re right!
Here’s an outline of some differences between holding a person or thing at fault vs blaming them. Notice the only similarity is the 1st point.
1. Hold someone/something responsible.
2. Hold someone/something accountable to repair/fix.
3. Awareness around what’s caused the problem.
4. You create options to resolve the situation independent of party at fault.
5. May choose to forgive offending party as a means to release yourself from the pain associated with the action.
6. Judgment, gossip, and shame don’t need to enter the picture and you are left with unlimited possibilities to move forward.
1. Hold someone/something responsible.
2. You have a Passive Aggressive response and no real intention to hold them accountable.
3. May or may not be aware of what truly created the problem.
4. The only option to resolving issue is for the party being blamed to fix it or change.
5. Can’t forgive other party and will act as a victim until other party/person changes.
6. Often turns to gossip and shame and always keeps you in a small and constricted position.
The problem with acting like you’re a victim is that no one is coming to save you.
We all blame and it’s important to note that we have a choice whether to instead acknowledge someone at fault without judgment, gossip, shame or blame. It’s a big difference which approach we take and when we accept that blaming others only leaves us as a helpless victim we can then take the steps necessary to get our power back.
Weekly ISA Challenge: Taking Your Power Back
Step 1: Identify something in your life that you are blaming (i.e.; partner, government, employer, friend, etc.)
Step 2: Decide that you are no longer a victim.
Step 3: Hold the other party accountable, if you can, and then write down 3 options in which you can change the situation.
Step 4: Act on one of those 3 options this week and begin the process of taking your power back.
Note: Be careful, as excuses will jump all over you. Your inner critic will come up with all kinds of reasons why those 3 options won’t work and why you’re stuck. If this happens tell your inner critic, you’re just going to try it out. If your inner critic comes back strong, tell it that it’s probably right and will likely tell you, “I told you so” but you’re just going to humor yourself this one time.
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With Gratitude and Appreciation,